I am perplexed.
I have this deep rooted desire to write. Write all the time. I want to write a book one day. Another thing I think about often. I think about the chapters, who the characters would be and what I want the focus of the book to be. And then...I think to myself "If you can't even write a simple blog post--HOW are you going to write a whole book?!"
In many areas of my life I am learning about motivation. What keeps someone from completing something and what gets them to do it. So, you ask, what is my motivation to not blog everyday?
Failure.
Not just any failure.
EPIC FAILURE.
The type of failure that leads to embarrassment and the deep desire that you wish you never wrote what you did. But that's not all:
Success.
Why this fear?
What if I am so successful I have to choose between more than one thing I love?!
Oh sob sob you say. Cry about the possibility of being SUCCESSFUL! What is your problem? I hear your thoughts screaming from that brain of yours. Or are those my thoughts? It is likely those thoughts are my own. My own thoughts of humility of the fear of being successful.
I wonder. Is this why I fail at building the body image I desire? Because I am afraid of success? Or is it failure? Or a twisted combination of the two? Is it easier to be unhappy with not completing goals, or is it easier to be happy after completing something?
I don't have any answers. All I know is that if I can stop debating on how to do something, I will actually do all those things I want to do.
What do you think? Does this seem like any kind of debate you have in your mind?
